The picture close to this paragraph was taken in July of 2007. My hair is long, and there is something I got from Patricia to hold the hair in place on top of my head. What do you call those things, anyway? Like an elastic band.
(Oh, remember: You can click on the images in this or any other Bevboy's Blog post to see a bigger image. Go ahead and click. You know you want to.)
Today at work, there was a silent auction. I was lucky enough to win an ipod nano, which I gave to Patricia after work, as it is her birthday. Go ahead and wish her a happy birthday on facebook if you want to. She'd appreciate it.
I paid for the ipod. Upon returning to my office, there was the following note on my monitor:

Hmm. What was this all about? I asked a few people if they recognized the handwriting. Nobody did. The boys at coffee chuckled at the note, and one of them opined that a guy in the office might have written it.
A guy?
Really?
What kind of man writes that way? For one thing, it is legible. Most guys write like they're on a sinking ship, and there is one spot left on the last lifeboat, where the women and children are, and an old lady is making her way over to it.
This handwriting has a decidedly feminine aspect to it. The curlicues, the haughty attitude, the fact that it was written on yellow paper, all lead me to believe that a woman produced this note. A woman, it would seem, who doesn't like cottages very much.
I wasn't sure what to do. I am still not sure what to do. I changed the picture on my desktop to the one you see near this paragraph. It is in some ways even more outrageous and unflattering than the one it replaced. I am wondering, by doing this, if I can smoke her out, if I can lead her to do something stupid, so that I can find out who did this to me.
If you have any pearls of wisdom to assist me in tracking down the person who wrote this scurrilous note, this apoplectic screed, this mangy missive, please let me know via comments to this post. I fear that this will be an ongoing challenge for me, and that I will have to expend considerable time, strength and energy to track down this horrid person.
Wish me luck! I will need it!
Bevboy
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