This one is particularly upsetting, ladies and gentlemen.
In looking under the Christmas tree just now, Bevboy found no presents. Which makes Bevboy a very sad boy indeed.
I mean, there’s a power bar, but that is used to keep the lights on the tree. You know, the tree, the one with no presents underneath it!!
They have all kinds of food drives and toy drives this time of year. These are all honourable charities, and Bevboy heartily supports them. But why doesn’t anybody love Bevboy enough to buy him some presents? Why does he have to look at an empty tree during this special time of year?
It just isn’t fair!
Damn you all!.
I just can’t write any more.